Superwoman. Super powers.

How does one define a Superwoman?  There are as many answers to that as there are original "Superwomen."  As a woman who grew up during the "Quiet Revolution" Superwomen were everywhere for me.  Women could bring home the bacon; fry it up in a pan.  Women could go to college and be something other than a teacher or a nurse.  Women could get married, have children AND work.  This was very different from the usual path for women in the generations before me.  Despite that I still had excellent role models.  My Mom, who went to school to be a teacher, worked in her field for one year.  She raised three children, did the books, marketing and much more for my Dad's business.  She went back to work once her youngest was well established in school and now has her Master's and works in a male-dominated field.  Successfully.

Her Mom was a typical Stay At Home Mom of the 40s until she was able to find a job in retail.  She was extremely successful in that role.  When that job was eliminated in the late 80s she began volunteering for an organization and did so well for the group they hired her on staff.  She still has the letter she received from the President of that organization when she retired (a second time).  My Mom and her Mom did it all.  Raised a family, managed the house and worked.  There were no boards, no social media to help them through their potty crisis.  Or their “my boss sucks” crisis.  They worked.  They cleaned. They cooked.  They loved. 

When I got married in 1995 I knew I wanted to have a family. Fairly soon.  But I was in the middle of building an extremely successful career in a male-dominated field.  I traveled.  I rode in limos.  I ate at the best restaurants (too much).  I took care of our apartment.  And nodded at the finances once in awhile.  I thought about how on earth I was going to have kids and keep up this schedule.  And if I didn't keep up the schedule what was I going to do?  How would I help support our family if I didn't continue on this path?

God and life had a very different plan for me.  Infertility took us down a very different road.  And I was able to keep my career moving forward while we tried for a family.

In 2002 I took the big leap and went freelance.  Permanently.  For anyone who has grappled with this decision it is exciting and terrifying all in one breath.  It was the best decision I made.  And I of course can say that with full confidence as I have been on the other side for 8 years now.

When I made the jump there were no children.  My risk was fairly low.  Would I do the same thing, now with kids?  I'm not sure I would.  

I have been a Work-at-Home Mom (WAHM) since 2005.  I hate that term.  To me work-at-home implies that if you don't have a career that you are not working at home.  Any stay-at-home Mom will tell you, loudly, this is very, very untrue.  But balancing a career at home with your stay-at-home duties is challenging.  When you are working, you feel guilty for not spending time with the kids.  When you are with the kids, the beep of your Blackberry makes you wonder what is going on with work. 

So how do you find the balance?  If you work at home, in addition to working at home, how do you do it?  How much time are you able to put in?  Do you have child care, or is Dora your babysitter?  Do you work during the day or only at night?  And if you work at night how does it affect your life with your spouse?

I'd love to hear your take on this.